1 Saskatchewan 33 19 10 4 42 121 105 +16 10-4-1 9-6-3 2 - 0 6-1-3 Won 6
2 Vancouver 30 18 8 4 40 98 77 +21 11-3-2 7-5-2 1 - 2 8-1-1 Won 3
3 Green Bay 8 5 1 4 32 75 90 -15 7-7-2 7-6-2 0 - 3 3-5-2 Won 1
4 Calgary 33 14 16 3 31 90 96 -6 9-7-0 5-9-3 3 - 2 5-4-1 Lost 1
5 Edmonton 31 12 14 5 29 84 108 -24 6-8-2 6-6-3 1 - 4 6-3-1 Won 1
Foxboro, MA (CRAP)
Our beloveds earned a 1/2 point on Sunday with an obscure rule that keeps them more in the Playoff hunt than previously thought.
Said recovering lawyer and NFL Commissioner Roger Baddell, "Stupid Rule 739.1.4 paragraph 18 reads, 'if the team losing on the scoreboard possesses the ball more than 40 minutes (40:48), outpasses the opposing Hall of Fame bound QB (226-136), outrushes them (143-113), and outgains the opponent by 120 or more yards (369-249), and gives up a return by a large white offensive lineman of more than 6 yards (this one was an NFL record 71), the said losing team, by rule, and by edict from on high by the Commissioners' Office, shall grant said bunch of losers who can't win a game decided by 4 pts. or less EVER, a 1/2 point."
This puts the Packers at 8-5-1, just 1/2 game behind Edmonton, and in a tie with Saskatchewan and Ottawa for the 2 remaining playoff spots (see standings and outstanding graphics above).
When told about the ruling, Heach Coach Mike McMuffin (Putty) said, "well we know we have a good football team. I think our footbal team knows what lies ahead. I believe our football team will respond to the challenge. Our football team will get to work on Wednesday and prepare to win (or perhaps get another 1/2 point) another football game. Our football team will clean up our mistakes (except for blitz pick ups by linemen from Iowa) and prepare to win a football game. We have a good football team. I coach a good football team. Did you know we have a football team? What was the question again?"
Well said coach, well said.
When informed the team was just 1/2 game behind Edmonton, LB Erik Walden (see photo) said, "cool man. We are going to crush Edmonton next week!" Then he went back to just destroying his second 40 ouncer of Olde English (see photo).
Editors Note: This awful story was written on only one cup of coffee. The guy's obviously a greg redard, but we were on deadline, and it's all we had. This effing site is going downhill quickly, but we spent the money from The Jewelry Center on beer, and we are tapped out. All the children will be disappointed with no gifts under hte Christmas tree this year. I guess when we are out of business you can always read the urinal online, cuz that's a good site. And there's another guy (moron) that if you google Packer Analysis you get some really good stuff, like 3rd down conversion rates, QB ratings by quarter, net interception return yardage, really interesting stuff.
No seriously, it's really interesting.
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