Ashwaubenon, WI (BFF)
General Manager Ted Thompson, known for his bold moves on and off the field (ask Justin Harrell about those!), has struck again. Despite an impressive ground attack last night in the narrow loss to the superior Chicago Bears, the irrepresible GM did not stand pat.
"I'd like to announce the signings of 2 outstanding running backs, Marcus Allen (age 52) and Barry Sanders (age 43), and welcome them to the Packer family. These two hall of famers will only strengthen a backfield that includes John Kuhn (white guy-Shippenburg State) and Brandon Jackson (black guy-Nebraska)."
Both Allen and Sanders were "surprised" though "excited" about the signings.
Said Allen, "I've pretty much just been doing autograph shows and a little TV work, but I walk the dog occasionally, and have a treadmill at home, so it shouldn't take me too long to get ready. The artificial hip may be a problem, but until I actually experience contact for the first time since the early 90's, who knows?"
Commented Sanders, looking fit seated on his customized scooter, "I've often wondered if I retired too early. The various scooters and walkers have really helped me stay off my feet, so my legs feel pretty good. I think I can make a positive impact. Obviously I'm better than Jackson."
When asked if there were other RB's he considered, Thompson mentioned he took a "really good look" at some film of Robert Smith from the '97 season, but backed off when Sanders orthopedic surgeon gave a "positive report." "Brent Fullwood had really let himself go, and O.J. Simpson still has quite a few years left on his prison sentence. So we feel good about adding these two."
To make room on the roster, Thompson traded Greg Jennings for a future 3rd rounder, and cut Cullen Jenkins. "I wish those guys nothing but the best, but it was time to go in another direction."
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